Looking back

This is probably my last letter of this year, as we enter December I’ll slow down a bit after a full year. So if it is, it has been a pleasure to write these and to know someone on the other side is reading and reflecting on them creating internal space and dialogue gives me such gratification. Thank you for being there and for allowing me to keep creating them.
As we get into the holiday season and as a new year approaches, we either might feel the rush to get some last things done on our list or we might want to start setting up the intentions for the coming year BUT before we jump into the cycle, let’s press PAUSE and reflect on this year. I’d like to propose a practice: instead of looking on all the things we couldn’t accomplish, where we think we “failed”, where there was lack. Let’s focus and write down or make a note on all the things we did this year, including the messiness of it, the shortcomings, the attempts and the intentions behind. More importantly, let’s notice what we felt. Let’s look back at our ongoing PROCESS. What we allowed, what we tried which maybe was both new and scared, let’s reflect on the times we took good care of ourselves, where we extended our hands to others in need. Let’s notice when we felt fear and shame, when we chose to keep going anyway, let’s reflect on the times where we were gentle with our journey, patient or impatient with the outcomes. Let’s notice the patterns we got to be more aware of. Look back to see the moments we listened to ourselves with attention and honor that voice or at least start to learn to do so. Bring forth to your mind moments of abundance, abundance of laughter, of tears of release, of questions. Making a note of our resilience, our capacity to begin again, each morning, choosing to begin again.
For so many, it was such an intense year, it felt quite deeply introspective, bringing us to a place of shedding layers, of getting to know ourselves better. Mostly my letters were so much about finding this intimacy, finding this flow and this presence amidst of it all because it’s in this flow, in this center that we can have the clarity, the trust, the force to drop in to be comfortable in the discomfort of this impermanent ride that is life.
And that is my deepest wish, for you, for me and for all of us, yes let’s work towards our intentions and plans for the new year but meanwhile let’s get closer and closer to ourselves, integrating ALL that we are. Let’s get curious with what the present moment is telling us and allowing our hearts and arms to be wide open and spacious, it might be a season of the new calendar year but each of us has our own internal seasons, our own internal cycles. Listen to them! Honor them! It’s ever changing, ever evolving making our journeys here so full.

Before I take a break, coming up soon is Class 2 from The Expansion Program (a series of online classes and meditations) and it’s a good one, it’s all about processing emotions which is a foundational tool for us to take inventory and move forward more integrated. Sign ups are already open, more info here.


Love,
Mariana

Mari Orkenyi